Forgiveness Will Set You Free

forgive

to stop blaming or being angry with someone for something that person has done, or not punish them for something:

 

Can we ever truly forgive those who have wronged us? Learn how this woman came to forgive the person who murdered her mother and brother:

TEDさんの投稿 2020年9月30日水曜日

 

 

Forgiveness is designed to set you free. When you say, "I forgive you," what you're really saying is, "I know what you did. It's not okay, but I recognize that you are more than that. I don't want to hold us captive to this thing anymore. I can heal myself, and I don't need anything from you." 

 When we choose vengeance, we're actually signing a blood oath to chain our story to our enemies for the rest of time. Forgiveness is the only real path to freedom

But to get free, you have to get super specific about what exactly it is that you're forgiving because you cannot forgive something that didn't happen to you.

You can't forgive your father for beating your mother. You can only forgive him for how sad, alienated and angry that made you feel.

I told him that what happened on December 19th, 2008, was not okay and would probably never be okay for either of us. But just because it wasn't okay, that didn't mean he owed me anything - not an apology, not an explanation, not his role as my villain. I told him that I hated to be reduced to one thing that happened to me one day. I yearned to be more, to be whole, and I didn't think that I could do that if I looked at another person and reduced him to one thing he did one day and made evil the sum of its parts. I told him that I wished him a lifetime full of healing and that I forgave him

Real forgiveness has to let go of all expectations. You can't expect a certain outcome. You can't expect them to reply.

TED　翻訳も載っているけど・・・・いまいちかなあ。こういうとき英語ができるといいね。